Dear Fricking Abby

I was at Panera Bread Co. today for a nice iced tea, minding my own business, enjoying the view, reading the Lifestyle section of the paper. My favorite. I love the comics and the word games. I laugh at the astrology. I do the crosswords in my mind. I read the advice columns.

Generally I find that Dear Abby gives incredibly bad advice: off of the mark, annoying. Today she grated.

Here's her little bit of advice from today's column that has me grinding my gears this late at night:

Dear Abby

Religionless Gathering, a man or woman engaged to be married, asked fricking Dear Abby what to do about prayer at their reception. See, Religionless Gathering is an atheist, as is their partner, and they do not wish to have prayer said over the meal at their small, informal wedding reception, in spite of most of their families being religious. Religionless is thoughtfully asking Abby if it would be rude to ask that prayers be addressed ahead of time, simply requesting that attendees say their own prayers silently.

And Abby? Dear Abby?
She replies that, YES, it WOULD be rude. So pull up your adult-sized wedding undies, Abby suggests, focus on the upcoming honeymoon, wink wink, and relax about the prayer.

WHAT IS THE HARM? 
Right?
That is the question.

SUCK IT UP.
Right?
That is the suggestion.

Well, guess what, those days of privileged are OVER.
Dear Abby needs to write to someone for advice on how to be fricking real. She needs to go to some outside source to figure out how to be respectful. She needs to step outside of her comfort zone and learn how to move through the world without thinking that she is so privileged and RIGHT that anyone else needs to step into line with her.

Yeah, she's wrong here.
Never again will I ever sit still while others hijack an event with their religious dogma, forcing everyone else to sit through their bizarre rituals, celebrations, or ceremonial bullshit. Never again will I (or YOU, I hope) go to an authority figure looking for support and kindness and let myself be treated like a whimpering, simpering child with no rights.

I am absolutely certain that the OP has grinned and born it hundreds, thousands of times. In fact, unless they stop looking for outside validation, they will continue to grin and bear it, push their own wishes down, and SUCK IT UP. My advice, Religionless Gathering, it's time to move forward into your maturity: out yourself. Stand tall and hold your head up with pride for being dogma-free!

Yeah, I'm thinking we need another advice columnist out there, and I want it to be ME!

 What do you think?.
 NO, SERIOUSLY, What do you think?.

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