Khan Academy Math: Not Shaming + INCLUSION = PROMOTION?

If you are a homeschooling parent, chances are you are quite familiar with Khan Academy website. If you're not familiar with it, make sure you check it out; it is an invaluable resource!

Khan Academy is a website started in 2008 by Salman Khan, a former hedge fund analyst, who began tutoring his cousin online. After awhile, other of Khan's relative's children began using his tutoring videos with their own children. Before long, his videos took off! And I mean through the roof! Through a combination of relatable lectures and SmoothDraw, Khan brought clarity to complex math ideas.

Before long, maybe a year!, Salman Khan quit his full time job to focus on creating and building Khan Academy School, a website with thousands of videos of discrete concepts and ideas for teachers, classes, and students. All of his work is completely free to users of the website. 

We used Khan Academy during our homeschooling years for higher math concepts that I was completely unable to understand, much less convey with any clarity to the kids. My kids became self-learners, in part, because of Khan Academy. I send my sincerest and heart-felt appreciation to Salman Khan.

 

KHAN DO!

Anyway, the reason for bringing up The Khan Academy is this. My friend Janeen brought a Christian website to my attention, specifically an article criticizing Khan Academy for promoting the LGBT agenda. The purpose of the article was to discourage Christian parents from using the Khan Academy because of its Leftist agenda, based on those who fund KA. The so-called evidence of this claim is coming through in the material presented as exercise problems. Take this example given in the OP:

The lesson is on "Irregular Plural Nouns: from 'f' to 'ves.'" The unsuspecting student is told to "Choose the correct plural noun to use in this sentence":

'Brittany and Sofia went to lunch with their _____ every Saturday.'"

Khan Academy's "correct" answer reveals the gay agenda behind the English "problem":

The only choices are "wifes" or "wives."

GASP, the gay agenda (as Janeen texted to me)!
Because INCLUDING is PROMOTING.  😠

And my educated and intellectual opinion is this: 
Those bitching about this can fuck right off.

On the other hand, I strenuously endorse Khan Academy as a source of inclusive, well-executed personal learning opportunities that are absolutely FREE and much of the material is available on YouTube. Subject matter on KA ranges from beginner to extremely advanced math to science to computing to arts and humanities to history or econ to test taking to career exploration to support resources for parents and teachers.

Khan Academy is truly an AMAZING resource that, sometimes, I think we don't deserve!  LOL
Salman Khan, many thanks to your dedication to the spread of accessible resources for all! Khan has also given us some wonderful TEDtalks and other resources on YouTube, please check it out!

No, REALLY, What Do You Think?

.........................................
Other Posts You Might Also Enjoy:
Strategies for Your Homeschool
Natural Learning
Teaching Things I Don't Know

GRIPE

atheist homeschool

Stop saying that my kid is shy, outgoing, aggressive, anxious, quiet, boisterous, argumentative, pouty, fidgety, chatty, whiny, or loud because he's homeschooled.

  

It's not fair that all the kids who go to school can be as annoying, as imperfect, as struggling, as unique, as child-like as they are without being branded as representative of anything but childhood.

Is School Superior to Homeschool?

homeschool blog homeschool blog homeschool blog homeschool blog homeschool blog homeschool blog homeschool blog homeschool blog 

Not long ago I was feeling overwhelmed and upset with some gaps that I had started to notice in one of my children's education. I was noticing that John was absolutely lost anytime another part of the globe was mentioned...geography!

One day John and I were looking at a St. Louis map and I realized that our metropolitan area was a total blur to him. And that wasn't surprising to me; he's not the most alert and aware teenager on the planet, what with his head bent over his phone whenever we are in the car. 

So I was worried, but then I remembered how completely lost I used to be while driving in the metro area when I was his age. And I relaxed a bit.

And I remembered how, at his age, I had no idea where the Middle East was and no idea what was there. And I relaxed even more.

And I remembered how anyplace in South America or Southeast Asia had been a complete mystery to me at his age...and dozens of other places too. And I relaxed even more.

And I saw some school kids who were John's age and I asked them if they knew where a few countries were and, guess what? They didn't know and hadn't even heard of the countries. And I relaxed even more.

It's easy, as a homeschooling parent, to see the gaps and to freak out about them. To see gigantic holes in the plan. To detect a giant deficiency in your well-meaning lessons. It's easy to feel depressed and defeated and to go the total distance and fear that you are messing up your kids forever. Because you are certain that everything matters, that everything weighs a ton. It's easy, sometimes, as a homeschooling parent to think that school kids are getting superior stuff in their contained buildings.

But I want to remind you of something true: School is not perfect.

Teachers are overwhelmed and under resourced. Districts are tragically underfunded. Classrooms are packed. School parents are mired in district rules and school requirements. Students have to follow absurd rules and have to jump through trivial hoops. Kids are bored. Studies feel meaningless to them. And of course there are wonderful things about schools too. I know that my the fortunate students who have my sister, Linda, as a teacher get to experience some of these wonderful things. I had some wonderful teachers too...but not nearly enough...

I'm certain that millions of parents wish they could embrace the freedom, the earnestness, and the significant profile of the homeschool lifestyle. I'm sure that millions of kids who are in school would love to homeschool.

And John will be fine. He'll find his way around town one day...just like I did.

 ......................................................................................... 

Apparently it is Ask an Atheist Week.

Please feel free to ask me anything!

In the meantime, please check out this blogpost

from a friend, Lori,

on her blog called On a Perfectly Lazy Day,

her answer to that common question that atheists get:

Why is being an Atheist

such a large part of your identity?

Should We Homeschool?

atheist homeschool atheist homeschool atheist homeschool atheist homeschool atheist homeschool atheist homeschool atheist homeschool atheist homeschool 

When my daughter was in kindergarten I was so excited to be a room mother, to be a part of the PTA, to spend time helping the teacher, and to help contribute to the school community in other ways. It was a thing that I looked forward to from the very moment I became a parent, even before that. From the very start I wanted to do my part in participating in the local elementary school as a family.

I imagined myself bringing cupcakes, planning Valentine's Day parties, pouring the juice. I would have been that go-to parent whenever a teacher needed a hand during field trips or on photocopy day. I could envision my kids at their desks waving proudly as I peeked in from outside of their classroom door.

Elizabeth loved kindergarten. She loved her work, loved learning, and she truly loved her excellent kindergarten teacher. Mrs. Wilson was such a great kindie teacher. She was extra sweet, super pretty (as all kindie teachers should be), and most importantly, she excelled at her job. She had double master's degrees in education. She was brilliant and dedicated and she loved her class and I was super impressed with her.

Elizabeth was in school and I did volunteer in her classroom every week on Thursday afternoons. I loved being in the classroom and I felt like I was learning so much about schooling and learning and teaching and about what it meant to be knowledgeable. Elizabeth did wave at me proudly across the room.

At the same time, my best friend was homeschooling her children. Lara had two kids at that time who were my own kids' ages; we were one big happy group of best friends. I watched her too and learned everything I could about homeschooling. I admired how I saw her family moving through the world and I longed for the natural lifestyle that homeschooling seemed to offer.

I watched Elizabeth feeling proud of herself in the classroom, pleasing Mrs. Wilson, participating in daily routines each afternoon, and being a part of those kids and their lives each day. And still, for four months I read and researched homeschool, public school, learning styles, teaching theory...everything I could get my hands on.

One afternoon I was in the classroom with Mrs. Wilson alone while the kids were in the library. I was working on some paper sorting or packet binding or some other activity when I decided to talk to her about homeschooling. We spent about an hour talking about the homeschool vs. public school lifestyle, methods, advantages and disadvantages of each. She had so much to say about how bright and motivated Elizabeth was and how optimistic she was about the prospect of homeschool for Elizabeth. She even said that she was planning on homeschooling her own children one day.

The decision to homeschool was not an easy one to make. School was really working for Elizabeth. Making the decision to homeschool was absolutely not about rejecting school as much as it was about embracing the lifestyle of homeschool. I have had many days where I doubted the entire enterprise and many more days where I have been confident that we were doing the right thing. But I never stop thinking about it; even now I continue to revisit the decision, now for John. 

John and I recently sat down and discussed his educational goals for this year and next. At this time next year he will be starting attending the local community college as a dually-enrolled homeschooler. And he's happy.

When I think of those earliest days when my husband and I were debating and researching and struggling on how to proceed educationally for our kids, I still remember the gnawing, desperate desire to make the right decision.

I'm still convinced.

Top 10 Homeschool Parent Pet Peeves

homeschool atheist homeschool atheist homeschool atheist homeschool atheist homeschool atheist homeschool atheist homeschool atheist homeschool atheist 

I'm definitely the Homeschool Supporter. I'm the person who is very vocal and willing to shout my bias for homeschooling from the rooftops but there are a few things that, in my opinion, are tremendous growth areas. I've been a homeschooling parent for over twelve years now and I know many homeschooling families internationally so I have a unique perspective on the homeschool environment. If you are a homeschooling parent I welcome your comments below, including your additions to this list.

1. Socialization
   That's right. I said it.
   If I never hear this question again it will be too soon. Not to say that I don't take the question seriously; I have written about socialization here on this blog about two dozen times. I shall summarize by saying that every single homeschooling parent that I know takes this issue seriously. We have found that socialization and socializing are different for homeschoolers. Not inferior, different. We are far more deliberate in our friendship-making because our children don't sit in a classroom with thirty or more students of the same age five days a week. We make every effort to locate and help nurture connection. Our efforts would surprise you.
   
   Also, I find it necessary to mention the fact that socialization is a very serious issue for public school kids. I wrote an entire blog post about it but I will spare you that. Go to Google and type in Bullying and Public School. Go ahead. I'll wait.
   .
2. Gifted or Spectrum
   It is often assumed that a homeschool child is either brilliant, on the autism spectrum, or both. We've gotten used to it, the general populace trying to figure out exactly how to characterize homeschoolers. I appreciate the efforts of the general citizenry trying to identify popular themes in the homeschooling community, however inaccurate that effort is.
   
   It is true that many homeschooled children are quite accomplished, many are on the autism spectrum, and many identify with both labels.
   However, most homeschool kids are your average kid.
   So, yes, they are brilliant.
   .
3. Go to School
   
   Any parent of a child in any school of any ilk can report problems with the school, the teacher, the curriculum, the school district, their child's behavior, bullying, etc and we listen and understand their struggles. Unless someone specifically asks, I never ask Is this a good time to consider homeschooling?.
   Any homeschool parent who complains about any issues they are having will invariably hear the question, Is this a good time to consider sending them to school? unless, that is, if the homeschooling parent is talking to another homeschooling parent. Then we just offer support.
   .
4. The Pop Quiz
   Every single one of us can report a time when we are in public or at a family gathering and someone decides to give our kids a little pop quiz.
   How much change should I give you? How do we factor integers? Where is Estonia? What does ignominious mean?
   
   We have been pop quizzed in restaurants, grocery stores, the homes of family members, the mall... Is this a homeschool thing? Do people quiz public schoolers?
   .
5. Homeschoolers are Religious: NO SCIENCE MATERIAL
   Do you know what? This is true. I don't know the percentages of homeschoolers who are Christian vs. secular vs. atheist, but from the amount of secular curriculum and materials out there I would assume the ratio is quite high. I know this because it is impossible, sad, frustrating, annoying and wrong that homeschool families cannot locate secular science materials. All secular materials are sorely underrepresented in materials available to the homeschool community.
   .
6. We are Targeted
   Because homeschooling has gained such momentum, publishers are finally putting out far more materials than ever in the past. And that's nice. But in reality we are being targeted with lower-cost, poorly-written materials as well as tons of materials published just to make a buck.
   .
7. Expensive Curriculum
   
   And speaking of curriculum, so many people feel pressured by their insecurities and good intentions. Unnecessarily expensive curriculum is offered to parents who feel overwhelmed by the flood of materials, who assume that cost equals quality, or who are bewildered by the recent deluge of materials now on the market.
   
   While there is great stuff out there, it can be difficult to figure out exactly what to use and what to spend, especially in the first few years of homeschooling.
   .
8. Secular Homeschoolers, Atheist Homeschoolers
   The vast majority of homeschool families are Christian families, Christian families who have also been overtly defamed by the Duggars and other families in the news who make homeschoolers look like a circus full of clowns or like a group of abusers.
   
   Secular homeschoolers are so in the minority in some places that families living in some parts of the south or in some highly rural areas cannot find like-minded friends. In fact, some secular families are openly smeared and ostracized. I know several families who are hiding the fact that they are atheists or secular homeschoolers simply because their Christian community will not handle that reality well.
   .
9. Homeschool Stereotypes
   It's normal, I know. It's easier to simplify things than to truly understand. But stereotypes are always wrong. So much of the criticism leveled at homeschoolers is so inaccurate, yet naysayers can be incredibly vocal. We are often called names like weird, odd, and forlorn. Living outside of the box is an honest expectation for families who choose this lifestyle.  Homeschooling parents learn to cheer lead whenever the need arises.
   .
10. Homeschool Pet Peeves
    The very exercise of mentioning pet peeves or criticism of homeschooling feels like a total betrayal of homeschooling in general. My sincere efforts toward honesty require that I mention that I am far more likely to defend than criticize homeschooling. And that's normal.

One of my favorite
hidden atheist homeschoolers.

Families that have chosen the lifestyle of homeschooling have many and varied reasons for making this decision. Personally I've seen the village and I don't want it raising my children. Also I am convinced that my children are better educated, better prepared for life, and much happier than I think I was after eighteen years in the public school system; of course that was way back in the day.
I think that they are better educated, better prepared for life, and much happier than some of the kids who are struggling to get schooled under the common core. Homeschool and public school kids are all unique and being schooled in their chosen way. Let's just support each other.

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Other Posts You Might Enjoy:
Maybe Homeschool is to Blame

OY!!! The NEA Has No Respect for Me

A Very Damaging List Against Homeschooling

Putting the Children First: Karen Loethen's Thoughts

Maybe Homeschool is to Blame

It wasn't long ago I was sitting with someone, out on the deck, enjoying the sun, catching up; we were talking about the kids and how they are doing in all of their activities. College is great: check. Work is great: check. Friendships are great: check. Kids are happy: check. The kids are amazing: check. Stuff, in general is good: check.

I mentioned that my daughter struggles with some minor anxieties, namely an anxiety when it comes to calling people on the telephone. My chatting partner said Hmmmm, do you think it has anything to do with the fact that you homeschooled her?
Really?
REALLY?

NO, I didn't blow my stack, but I was very taken aback.

Will we ever get past the stigma of homeschooling, that thing where every single imperfection of my children, won't be attributed to homeschooling? Do we sit together, talk about our own imperfections and think Hmmmm, do you think it has anything to do with the fact that we went to public school?

Human beings are imperfect. We have fears and anger and turmoil and struggles and anxiety and down times and conflict and all of that. It's normal. It's noteworthy when these challenging things happen because usually we are fine and dandy and strong and happy and productive.

And FORGET THE FACT that nearly everyone on both sides of my family takes antidepressants.  😒 Being depressed is completely normal in this family.

And now, to give space to the rant that I didn't do that day:

No one, NO ONE has thought about how homeschooling (and every other choice we make in this family) affects my children more than I DO! If I thought that homeschooling was not the right thing to be doing for my children, I wouldn't be doing it! ALSO, anxiety is everywhere in my own family of origin, is it any surprise that this child has a touch of it? And, if she had been in school we would blame the system! Furthermore, I'm convinced that her anxiety is so much better for having been homeschooled. ALSO, this is a thinly-veiled criticism directed toward me...from this person.

AND, WOW, my kids are cool!
Can we attribute any of their good qualities to having been homeschooled??????

AHEM......I'm better now.

Homeschooling is bold and dynamic and unique and empowering. Study after study after evidence after proof and still I get this question?  LOL...someone is out of touch...and it isn't me.

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Other Posts You Might Enjoy

More Reasons to Homeschool...In The News

That's What She Said

Prospective Homeschool Parents: Part 1 of 5

Prospective Homeschool Parents: Part 2 of 5: Your Homeschool Fears
Prospective Homeschool Parents: Part 3 of 5: Benefits of Homeschooling

OY!!! The NEA Has No Respect for Me

homeschooling atheist parent atheist parent
SO, apparently the NEA (National Education Association) has come out strongly against homeschooling in their 2014-2015 resolutions. I hope you take a moment and read what the NEA has decided is their public stance toward homeschooling:

Now the National Education Association describes their goals and missions as being one of providing public education for every child in their purview. Which makes me wonder why they have anything at all to say about homeschooling. But it's nice to know how unhappy the organization is toward homeschooling and scary to wonder who is listening to them.

The resolution states: Homeschooling programs based on parental 
 choice cannot provide the student with a comprehensive educational experience. 

THEY SAID THAT.
The unmitigated AUDACITY of this comment is what set me off on this rant to start with. The outright pomposity of the writing notwithstanding, I find it unbelievably conceited and uninformed of this organization to make a statement that is so very false when anyone can find opposing evidence so easily online. Study after study has pronounced homeschooling to be a successful and healthy way to educate our children.

Furthermore, I think it's just unkind and mean-spirited to specifically recommend disallowing homeschooling kids from participating in school activities. It's like saying You are either with or against us. We are immature about this. 

Isn't this kind of...small? Some children in homeschool families get sports, music, tutoring, etc from local schools, as they should! Can we talk about how my taxes support the schools in my district even though we don't get any services there. Without even mentioning my support of the school district, it just seems bullyish to deny our kids access to district activities.

Our family did approach our nearest high school a few years ago, hoping my daughter could participate in after school theater. Although the theater teacher was thrilled to have her there, the teacher ultimately, grudgingly told my daughter couldn't participate in school activities as  homeschooler. Allowing homeschool kids participate in school activities is already an issue dealt with differently from district to district.

The NEA's position on and recommendation of a homeschooling parent being licensed or overseen by some authoritative body is, to me, another piece of evidence showing that the NEA has no idea what homeschooling is all about. It is not school at home. This lifestyle, homeschooling, is about teaching as they learn, following interests, creating our own unique educational experience for our kids, responding to our children's needs instantly. For some people, it is true, homeschooling is a rejection of public education; the NEA actually thinking that they should offer any guidelines for homeschoolers is the ultimate arrogance.

The idea that someone else should select the materials that we use in our home would push me right over the edge. Again, this is not school at home. I promise you, I would start operating under the table if the State Department of Education would assume to decide materials for my children. NO ONE has the right to tell me what to do. Again, this suggestion of the NEA's most resent resolution shows how little they understand what we are doing and why we are doing it.

I realize that this document that they released has no power, but some political powers might actually look to the NEA for advice regarding homeschooling in their state. In fact, it would seem to me that the failures of the schools in this country would make the word of the NEA no more than powerless drivel.

Regardless, Homeschoolers are not in the purview of the NEA.
And the NEA has no respect from me.
I know quite a few people who are in support of abolishing the public school system in its entirety for its failures and weaknesses and its abuses. I am not one of them; I am simply  a m u s e d  by their contempt.

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You Might Also Enjoy:
More Reasons to Homeschool...In the News
Homeschool Strategies
A Very Damaging List Against Homeschooling
Homeschoolers are Weird

Next Time Tell Them that YOU WOULDN'T Do It!

homeschool

The other day Elizabeth was telling me about a conversation that she had with her Composition teacher at school. As they were talking about the type of work on the docket for the class (Comp II) Elizabeth told her instructor I've never had to write an argument paper before.

FREEZE RIGHT THERE, KEMOSABEE.
HOLD.  IT.  RIGHT.  THERE.

Elizabeth, when you are talking to people, please remember that you are representing homeschool and, in many ways, ME to the people in your world. Next time, please truthfully say, Mom worked with me on this type of writing (or other work) and I REFUSED TO DO IT.

OK, thanks, Honey. Carry on with your story...

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Posts you might like:
What Do You Do All Day?
Keeping Up with the Graduating Seniors
In the Name of Transparency:  Negatives of Homeschooling
Dumb

A Very Damaging List Against Homeschooling

The post that brings the most people to my blog site is called "The Case Against Homeschooling".  Are these folks coming here looking for a case against homeschooling?
I'm happy to provide!

I'm not the slightest bit afraid to talk about those subjects that might expose the negatives of homeschooling. Because, in spite of them, after all, it's always a choice.  

For goodness sake, parenting is rife with choices from morning until night!  How to educate, feed, raise, discipline, guide, let go of, hold on to.  ...Decisions all over the place that each parent must make somehow. As for the negatives below, I have found, after twelve years of homeschooling, that almost every single thing on the con list below, somehow becomes a pro of homeschooling at some point!

I'm going to offer this little expose' in honor of all of those children and families who are about to begin and who want the total, unhidden, balanced truth.


This is my writing and I offer it as such, my story. Someone else might have a different list.

• We live in a neighborhood with elderly neighbors, most of whom have lived in the same home since having it built forty years ago. We have no children in our neighborhood except for the unkind kid who verbally attacks John every time they get together (isn't that boy nicely socialized?) and the other kid down the street who is the drinker and smoker. We care about this second boy boy alot, but the kids don't want to hang out with him much; sometimes they still do. 
  
  But my point is that this means that we are ALONE. We don't have a single neighborhood friend to play with. While this isn't, specifically, a homeschool issue, it does effect our homeschooling experience because, unless we leave the house and drive, we don't get to hang out with kids daily.
  .
• The kids don't see other kids every day.
  We see them often, maybe 2-3 times per week, on average. Much more some weeks, less others. However, this is not socialization, this is socializing. When we do get together with friends the time spent together is very in-depth and meaningful, usually.
  
  As for socialization, my daughter is in her first year as a dually-enrolled homeschooler at the local community college and her instructors have all commented on how mature and dedicated of a student she is AND she has made some fun friends quite easily. Today, TODAY she asked a guy for his phone number and he gave it to her.  😀
  .
• Our house is a mess.
  We are here in our home far more than most families. Messes multiply around here. We have more books and games and stuff than we need. Mostly books. Activities are spread all over my house as I type. Several people are involved in several different activities that require space and time. So it's messy, but busy.
  .
• Homeschooling takes time.
  Your time, parental time. As the mother and major homeschooling parent in the house, I spend a great deal of time on planning, researching, and more planning. It takes organization and a great computer. There is no way around the need for planning.  
  
  Being a homeschool parent requires  footwork to find what’s available in the community, figuring out how to get information on your own, knowing how to access people who can answer your questions, and knowing how to communicate well. These are are essentials skills of being a homeschooling parent. Being resourceful is essential.
  
  
  .
• Can you support your child as they are?
  They will be with you 24/7. Can you honestly embrace the person that they truly are? Homeschooling is like putting every problem into a pan and boiling it down. Soon the problems are all that you can see...unless you find a way to commit yourself the the children that you have. You have to accept them so that they can accept themselves and move successfully into life.
  
  For many parents, this is the exact reason why they do homeschool, so that their children can experience acceptance and encouragement for who they truly are.
  .
• I don't know everything about every subject.
  Again, planning, researching, planning. Time well spent, but time, nonetheless.
  
  AND my kids can do math in spite of me.
  .
• Not everyone approves.
  Can you remain dedicated to a lifestyle that often takes hits from family and friends and media? People will disapprove without having the slightest understanding of it. It is a lifestyle choice that people feel the need to give their two cents on. Overall, people are very supportive and admire us. But there are those folks who can't accept it.
  
  .
• Some learning objectives work best in group environments. 
  Homeschool groups and co ops are useful for many different types of these objectives, but there is still organization and planning involved. With a little initiative your kids can and will have some of the most wonderfully meaningful group experiences ever.
  .
•  Did I mention cost? 
  Some homeschool families spend hundreds or thousands of dollars a year on materials and optional experiences. This type of cash outlay is not necessary. I know very frugal families who homeschool extremely successfully. But, as we all know, some great activities cost money.
  .
• Some kids are unwilling to work.
  This shows itself in many different ways, little gets done. Lessons require a certain amount of willingness on the part of the child. If your child is less-than-motivated, it's not much fun.
  Just like if they were in school.
  .
• Homeschooling parents have less free time or child-free time. Privacy? I get some, but I have to create it. It's all about balance. As a homeschooling parent, you will have to figure this one out. Parents always need to figure this one out no matter how their children are educated!
  .
• Homeschooling through high school
  This part of homeschooling requires some more...YEP, research and organization and creativity. People homeschool through high school every day, including my daughter!  It works.

  

  John and I at Falling Water

  .
• Homeschool families can be marginalized, demonized, and, generally, be treated oddly.
  Living outside of the box is an honest expectation for families who choose this lifestyle. Homeschooling parents learn to cheer lead whenever the need arises. At some point this outside of the box experience will become a point of pride...once you can let go of needing approval from those around you.
  .
• For some parents, the doubt comes and goes, but never really disappears. It's the nature of the individual that matters. I know of several parents who are constantly on edge about homeschooling while other parents I know are the freaking paragons of placidity! Homeschooler's angst can be like having the world's worst friend in your own head! But I know of public school parents who doubt their choices there too.
  
  I'm pretty sure that this is more a personality issue than a homeschool one, specifically. But I mention it because our own personalities are very much a part of our family lifestyle.
  .
• There are no overseeing bodies to reprimand, guide, or support you. So, you are, truly, on your own. This can freak some folks out. For others, it is a comfort. I love it, but as first I was frightened. It took me about a year to truly appreciate this part of homeschooling; having other homeschoolers to talk with made all of the difference. Now this is one of my favorite things about homeschooling, knowing that our decisions are our own and that our children are being educated with sense and reason rather than the fear that school standards reflect.
  .
•  Accepting the fact that children learn at different levels and different speeds. They actually do. Even when they are in school. But it's more obvious in homeschooling.
  .
•  And, it is up to YOU, to your family, what gets into their lives. Talk about a panic sandwich with guilt on top. Very often you are going where there are no roads. Get ready to steam your way down a path of your own construction. homeschooling. Believe me, you will be empowered!

That's my honest list AGAINST. Being a parent means being constantly on the look out for the best thing for your child. I hope this list helps. I hope you realize that this list is intended to let you know, up front, some of what you will have on your place if you homeschool. I hope the list doesn't turn you off...just be more informed! 

What About Socialization?

Nope, I don't think that's a problem.  

Honestly.  When we get with kids, 
we experience the exact same things every group of kids does.  

The kids learn sharing, what a bully looks like, conflict resolution, 
popularity, peer pressure, etc. 
and the kids are just...normal.


Have I missed anything?
What "negs" would you add to this list?

This post is an encore post
and, as it happens, not very damaging at all!

What Do You Do All Day?

atheist blog atheist homeschool

The question usually comes from the parent of a public school child. I know what school looks like. It is nice and structured and scheduled, nice bells regularly chiming every fifty minutes, boxes of exciting and brightly-colored materials on the shelves, handmade crafts swinging in the breeze from paper clips attached to the light fixtures over head, monthly new bulletin boards, permission slips and dress codes, and SRAs to keep you busy when you finish your work before everyone else.

No wonder non-homeschool parents can't wrap their heads around what we could possibly be doing all day! No, I don't go use the mimeograph machine. I haven't used cardboard carrels around the kids as they work  No paste smells. No raising hands to answer questions. No alphabet stapled above the chalkboard. No behavior grading in the corner of the chalkboard. No rubric to consider. Homeschoolers have no state standards and no test to teach to. 

So what does that leave?  
Well, everything.

We read and write and listen to music and talk to people and travel and explore and ask questions and keep our brains and our bodies active. If you were a bug on the wall of one hundred different homeschooling families you would discover one hundred different ways to homeschool, one hundred different answers to the question What did you do today?

This question, what do you do all day, simple as it sounds, is actually a very loaded question. It suggests that the stereotypes are true. That kids are bored. That husbands don't help. That teens are naturally to be distanced from. That Mom is carrying the burden. It implies that children would have no idea what to do with their time if someone didn't organize it. It gives very little value to doing nothing. It also suggests that the day looming ahead of you with absolutely nothing planned is a thing to fear.

I've had my doubts, my tears, my fears about homeschooling. At any one time our homeschooling includes about as much freedom as each of us can handle that day. And it always come back to remembering that forcing information and lessons on a child does very little to actually educate that child. I personally spent over eighteen years as a student in school myself and there is SO MUCH that I don't remember, that I never really understood, or that I simply didn't need in life. I think of the many stories that each of us have about how awful our school years were. I think of the drudgery and tedium. I remember the reasons why we chose this lifestyle.

I think of myself being an excellent essay writer and test taker, but having absolutely no lasting knowledge from many years of schooling. I think about the misery of trying to fit a square peg into a round hole. I think about how grateful I am that there is absolutely no need to force-fit my children into a system that is not welcoming to uniqueness, kindness, open hearts, introversion, or creativity. I think of how the freedom to make choices each day opens up doors that we are often surprised to discover. I think of how boredom always puts the onus of activity on the bored. Without plans and schedules, we manage to create wealth, depth, and breadth many days.

So what DO we do?  We homeschool.

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Sometimes I still find myself struggling with exactly what we are doing with regards to our homeschooling, with the definition of education, and with our expectations for homeschooling children in this family.  

On one hand we tend to be something of an unschooling family. Moving through life brings so many full and important lessons. On the other hand, I believe in reading the classics, in being able to write a decent essay, in being familiar with history and geography and science and math. These subjects don't just cover themselves when one unschools, so we do have lessons. Um, a bit of dissonance happening, do you reckon? 

Maybe, but it works for us. The kids do move back and forth with me as we move between these two poles of unschool and Classical homeschool. I still have a problem with forcing kids to learn unnecessary things, memorize stuff, and meet standardized testing goals. In my book, that is not learning, that is having kids meet adult needs for believing we are teaching something. I am aware of my own needs and expectations and goals enough to limit how often I make the kids to work simply to comfort my fears and uneasiness. And the truth is, getting my kids to meet my Classical Homeschooling goals is something of a joke.

It's tough right about now. I see friends attending graduation of their own kids from academically rigorous high schools and I have to honestly confess that I'm feeling the doubt. The prom pictures, the cap and gowns, the valedictorians, the SATS...  Elizabeth and I are both feeling the pull of these cultural milestones. We are very proud of the experiences of our friends and thrilled to see the excitement of their accomplishments! But that promise of a prom has always been a bit of a sticking point for my daughter... We aren't seeing any of this happening down here in Australia, so we are hoping the homeschool proms offered back home will be fun for her next year...

I find myself having to think through my personal education philosophy frequently these days. It's me. I want to raise my kids right and, sometimes it's not so easy knowing what to do...

But when you get down to it, just because I'm struggling right now doesn't mean I think the school system is the answer.

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In the Name of Transparency: Negatives of Homeschooling

How honest should I be here?
Well, I'm a bit too honest, I have heard, and this post will be no different.  Especially since I am PMSing.  Homeschooling isn't perfect.  No form of education and no parenting is perfect.  I have a strong need to be open and honest and to show readers the truth about (our) homeschool experiences.

People come to this blog for many reasons.  From the statistics available to me, I see many many people out there searching for negatives of homeschooling, disadvantages of homeschool, and posts against homeschooling.  (These are actual search terms that bring people here again and again.)  I try to accommodate them, but I'm not sure my information is what they are looking for.

Still I try.  I'm here to tell you about the negatives of homeschool in our family, in our house.  Our lives aren't perfect.  But our lives are good!
I am aware of growth areas that our family possesses.  We are imperfect.
Here, I am going to make it clear and transparent.  I am trying to discuss the "negative" as honestly and clearly as I can.  I have talked to the kids about this and they are supportive of the post.

• Normalcy - The kids both have questions about what is "normal."  Are they "normal?  They both have had experiences where they have felt outside of the group and awkward when around large groups of school kids.  It's true.  They have both had experiences where they found these larger groups of kids confusing and ostracizing and creating of self-doubt.  They have both, at different times, walked away from events with groups of kids wondering why no one liked them. 
  
  Do I think this means that homeschooling doesn't work?  NO!  Not at all.  I think these feelings are absolutely normal, ironically.  I remember having these exact thoughts and feelings myself, and I was a public school kid.  Also, unlike my experience, they can put these thoughts into words and discuss them.  We are taking steps to improve their ability to interact in more situations and they are able to identify and verbalize their confusion.  Could you have done that at their age?

• Hierarchy - The kids don't really "get" the social hierarchy of the school-kid groups and nor do they get the group mentality thing.  I remember not getting this either when I was a kid...  When at a playground, such as an event that happened today, I see John trying to figure the "popularity" thing out...and doing pretty well.  Other times he just doesn't understand the qualities that count as "cool" in mainstream kiddom.  The other day I was talking to a young girl who goes to school and asking her about this issue of status and popularity.  She was totally clueless about how the popular kids work.  Again, we can't really say this is a homeschool issue, but a kid issue, an issue of growing up and learning.  But homeschoolers are not excused from it.  Just today my son was talking about how weird he finds it when kids in his class (he is taking a drama class) don't listen to the instructor or when they can't stay on topic, or when they can't focus during group activities.  He doesn't get why kids are so uncooperative in group activities.  I can't help but wonder if he is really the one struggling to understand groups..?

• Friendship Challenges - As a homeschooling family we have to deliberately seek out friendships and work to nurture them.  They aren't right next door or sequestered with the kids in the classroom year after year.  The kids have extremely excellent friendships, though.  Friends that I see as truly amazing people.  So, again, homeschooling friendships require more work, but they are worth it.

• Regret - Will the kids regret not having gone to school?  Will they look back and wish that they had had a daily injection of public school and what that brings?  We talk about this sometimes.  At this point they feel quite certain that homeschool is completely their decision and choice.  Will they regret it?  I don't know.  Will public school kids regret not having been homeschooled?

• I don't know everything - I absolutely do not know upper level math.  But when we do algebra and geometry, the kids get it.  We use high school textbooks for our lessons and we have always been able to figure it out, whatever it is.  I am usually able to get it long enough to get through a lesson, but I don't get it for the long term.  But they do.  As a matter of fact, this is an excellent example of how homeschool does work well.  The kids are learning how to learn algebra and geometry.  Learning how to learn.  Maybe this one shouldn't be on the list, but it's staying anyway because it's true; I don't know everything.  I couldn't list all of the presidents.  I don't know the constitutional amendments, I can't even remember what a hypotenuse is right now.  But I DO know how to find this information out!  And so do the kids.  Some would argue that knowing how to find out information is wisdom...,

• Unmotivated Learners - No kidding, neither of my kids wants to learn algebra.  No one is interested in politics.  Neither of the kids cares much about other cultures or history or earth science.  It is murder trying to teach things to kids that they don't care about.  I know this for a fact, because I remember classrooms full of kids like this...in school.

• PMS - I can be very moody and PMSing at times.  I dislike it tremendously.  The kids dislike it tremendously.  One of the kids also has PMS herself.  So this delight effects us regularly.  The nice thing is that we can organize ourselves around our best and more productive days and times.  But the PMS is no joking matter.

• I am lazy - No doubt about it, sometimes I am the one who is not motivated.  Also, I dislike structure and rules.  This does effect my kids.  Bonobo definitely responds well to both structure and rules...  He and I have often discussed his needs and my difficulty in meeting those needs.  "No problem, Mom," he says, "I know what to do at those times."

• It is difficult homeschooling kids who are not "readers" - at least for me.  I think of reading as a gateway drug.  It's like the door to so many wonderful worlds.  But neither of my kids enjoys reading anything that comes to them as an assignment.  The Doctor has read a hundred books this year...none of them from the list I gave her.  LOL And Bonobo really isn't a big reader.  Not his thing.  And DANG!  I am a huge reader! 

There it is, my list.
But it's MY list.  Other homeschool families would have a different list because there is no one family or list or description that covers all homeschool families.  So, if you, Dear Reader, came here looking for the BULLET that explains why homeschooling is bad, sorry to disappoint you.  But this is all I've got for you.

Even though this egregious list is before me in all of it's glory, in black and white, our family is still very much a homeschooling family.  Why?  With all of this ammunition against it?  Because we don't view the competition as any better.  AND because we choose it.  We are committed to the lifestyle.

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One more thing, the kids have asked me to out them with their real names. 
So, I present to you:

The Beautiful and Amazing 
Elizabeth

and The Awesome and Talented  
John

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*  This blog post is why I shouldn't blog while I am PMSing.   *grin*