How Can I Convince Them?

I spend YEARS of my life trying to convince someone that they were wrong about me.

It was someone determined to believe what he wanted to believe. Reality, truth, emotion, evidence. NOTHING convinced him otherwise and, worse, he spread stories and his opinion about me far and wide. To this day, I still feel it in some people when I interact with them. There is very little I can to do change it.

Why am I talking about this?
Because I see it on Facebook all of the time.

HOW can I convince my loved one to see that BL really do M?
What can I say to explain to my loved one how horrible the current president and his administration are?

Good people are constantly looking for the perfect words and phrases to convince their loved ones of fundamental humanist beliefs, of the belief in the goodness of all people.

So what are those words?
I'm sorry, but the answer is there are no special words.

There is nothing you can say.
These people aren't lacking in evidence; they are lacking in desire to believe what you believe or know to be true.
That is racism and that is a choice.

Do not be dismayed by the brokenness of the world.
All things break. And all things can be mended.
Not with time, as they say, but with intention.
So go. Love intentionally, extravagantly, unconditionally.
The broken world waits in darkness for the light that is you.
~L.R. Knost

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Things Happen for a Reason

OK, a less facetious answer might be in order.

I have to admit that this particular statement is a pet peeve of mine, so I'll try to keep that issue out of this post. If possible.

If you go out there on the interwebs and search for the phrase Everything Happens for a Reason, you will find thousands and thousands and thousands of bullshit sites (OOPS, there is is)  that offer comfort, wisdom, or woo promises to people that the world, the universe is out there with intention. That there are powers and magic in the universe that know your specific life issues and that have a mapped-out plan for you. Legit.

Genuine adult people can go out there online and get the brilliant wisdom that, not only is your life mapped out, but the universe has such control of your life that you don't have to worry a bit. Nope. People come and go into and out of your life for a reason. Bad things happen for a reason. Crises come along for a reason. We are put through the nightmares of life in order to teach us a lesson. All of the ups and downs happen to us because there is a reason for it. The pain has meaning.

Who can buy this?
Even most Christian and non-Christian reasons hold to the idea of Free Will over predetermination. Most religions and other belief philosophies buy big into personal growth and self-empowerment. How are thinking people supposed to figure out the tangling of thoughts that include this particular trope: everything happens for a reason? This phrase, too, is just an inch away from There are no Coincidences. The truth is, it's all coincidence. Things happen. Weird connections happen sometimes. Nature happens. It seems to me that that this statement would add negativity, confusion, even anger to the mix.

What negativity?
Maybe questions like How is this pain supposed to have a purpose? What sort of purpose can some devastating losses possible have? How can a person accept the purpose that terrible illness or terrible violence can possibly offer? What lesson am I missing from this pain? What sort of power would deliberately add overwhelming and repeating pain and loss to our lives for any possible reason? What sort of power is so malicious or cold that their only means of teaching lessons is by wounding or torturing us with heartbreak, chaos, or grief?

My thoughts is, if you are seeking meaning in your life, comfort from something painful or challenging, looking for growth in your life, looking for closure, looking for personal life lessons, or looking to make sense of your life, I guarantee that you can find a better mantra than Everything Happens for a Reason.

For example, try these:

• I can handle this.
• I'm a warrior!
• Tomorrow is another day.
• Word harder. Work smarter.
• I give myself permission to rest.
• I'm not going to give up!
• Show up for yourself.
• Know who's on your side.
• I am on my own side. 
• Do no harm but take no shit.
• Be the courage you need.
• I am enough.
• I believe in myself.
• I can ask for the help I need.
• One day at a time.
• Just for today...
• Be the change...
• What can I do today?
• Everything I need I have within me.
• A positive mind brings about positivity.
• I am present now, here.
• Feel the fear. Do it anyway.
• I can and I will.
• Be fully yourself.
• Feelings are not facts.
• Find the beauty in today.
• Wake up every day and live it.
• I trust in me.
• Sometimes you need to ride the wave.
• Don't make permanent decisions for temporary feelings.
• Sometimes you need to put yourself first.
• I can only control myself.
• Life doesn't get better by chance, but by choice.
• Try again tomorrow.
• Be bold!

If you find comfort is Everything Happens for a Reason, as some people do, think to yourself, could you, or any third grader, think of a better way for an event to happen? Could you conceive of a better way to learn strength or resilience or self control? Is there any other way to learn self-reliance, bits of wisdom, or how to make time for loved ones? If you can conceive of any kinder, gentler way to learn your lessons, couldn't the wise universe or other power do so too? 

So, if you need a personal mantra, borrow one or more of mine...until you get one of your own.


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I'm Still Offended...

If you read my blog post from a few weeks ago called I'm Offended, maybe you were left with a bad taste in your mouth, as I was. It's easy to point out the rudeness, the cognitive dissonance, or the weird irony of people who tend to make fun of someone saying I'm Offended by What You Are Saying. That's the easy part.

There can be more to this relationship with the person who tends to speak/post/act with the thought that they are being assertive rather than aggressive. It's possible to extend this relationship with this person who tends to think everyone is thinking it, I have the balls to say it. The relationship might be salvageable.*

Yes, pointing out the rudeness is easy; what might be harder is to take a moment and listen to the person who is annoyed with someone someone else's sensitivity. (The language here is a bit cumbersome and I'm trying to be clear. Stick with me.) For the sake of clarity and simplicity, I'm going to call the offended person Person A and I'm going to call the person making the brash, offending statements Person B.

I'm convinced that most people* mean to do the right thing. Their intentions are their saving point. Though, some People Bs simply have no interest in the emotions or thoughts of those that they choose to bully or abuse verbally and these relationships are the ones that may be best to limit or terminate completely. But some people, those whose friendships are salvageable, are unaware that the way they speak carries a sting. For these people, I offer these few simplified suggestions.

• Some people may not be aware of their general negativity. For these people, it is possible that they are sitting on top of some unprocessed anger, pain, grief, fear, or other emotion. 
• Almost all negativity comes from an underlying belief that the world is not a good place to live and that people are mostly bad. Imagine living like that.
• Most judging, pessimistic, and negative people think that the things outside of them cause their negative feelings.
• So, in some ways, their negativity is a cry for help, a cry for hope, a cry for a reminder of the good things in life.*
  Simply know this.
  
• We are all responsible for our own happiness. 
• In all things, Person A, seek your own happiness. Beyond all natural consequences of living a life, manifest as much positivity in your life as you can. You cannot and will not "heal" Person B's negativity.
• Therefore, avoid Person B and/or Person B's behavior any time you can. Be your positive, happy self, Person A. Hope that Person B learn from you. And simply live your life, thrive in your life, with as much joy as possible.

Always, and overall, it is our relationships that make life worth living that that give life meaning. If one or more of your relationships offer this type of negativity, I suggest you read more about bullying, healthy relationships, and getting yourself free. ☺️

*  If you have ended a relationship with someone who is abusive, do not return to it!
*  This reference does not refer to abusive, narcissistic people.
*  I DO NOT recommend that you shower negative people with your goodness; this WILL backfire.

What Do You Think?

Resisting Temptation is Too Hard

This week I've been in a constant state of astonishment about the Trump family and their compatriots, and their seeming inability to resist getting more money, cheating, hiding secrets, serious breeches of personal and professional ethics. I truly don't understand how fearful a person must be to feel as though they never have enough cash and as though they must cheat the system to get and hide more, to take the cash from other parties, or to feel entitled to the lion's share. It's a temptation that I can't relate to at all.

But it's there. The news these days is inundated with people in the financial upper 1% who want more, need  more, can't seem to stop themselves from gaining more at the expense of others. I truly wonder if that need to have 
more more more a temptation or a disorder ??? It seems like such a destructive drive, an enthrallment that brings nothing but disorder, anxiety, imprisonment, banishment, personal and professional collapse.

Surely there is an underlying sense of omnipotence, being above the law, being entitled, but there must also be some sense of fear, inadequacy, something that is being run from... All resulting in these people, and others of course, making decisions that they can't seem to resist...
ANYWAY...

This blog post is actually about that claim by some believers that atheists are atheists because we find it too difficult to resist temptation and we, therefore, avoid religion and its wisdom regarding the struggle of enticing things and behaviors, and we embrace the temptation...a claim that I strenuously reject.



Resisting Temptation is Too Hard

Inherent in such a claim is an underlying belief that atheists actually do believe in a deity but reject that deity for various character flaws or weaknesses, temptations. Also implicit in the Christian and religious view of temptation is that temptation leads one to sin, that we are broken, and that we are sinful by nature. 
All of these claims I reject strenuously, again.

Human beings are imperfect, all of us, those who believe and those who do not believe in supernatural things, all are imperfect and striving. We are all in this world where unhealthy or unwise allurements surround us and we all must find our way to the healthiest and happiest existence possible and that means we must learn how to avoid unhealthy, hurtful choices.

What do I mean about temptations?
I'm thinking of things like sexual behaviors that bring us or others pain, taking drugs or any other substance that brings us problematic health situations, stealing, greed, purchasing unnecessarily or extravagantly more, invasion of the privacy of another, wearing sweatpants every day, another Snickers®️, eating my fries across the table, getting yet another cuddly kitten, dangerous weight loss fads, giving up. These are all examples of very real temptations that all humans must figure out how to handle. Especially in this culture, we are teased and taunted and seduced continuously with unhealthy options. I submit that these are generally issues of consumerism rather than of demonic temptation.

These temptations are normal.
I have experienced nearly every one of these myself, minus the cats. In fact, I'm wearing sweatpants as I sit here typing this.

These temptations and allurements are not evil demons trying to ensnare you; they are a part of being alive and we are wise to learn mature and healthy ways to deal with them. Some believers will say that atheists truly know that a deity exists but that we, the atheists, do not wish to avoid temptation and so we reject their god. No, they will say, we want to live in temptation.  Our relativism is a mask for our overindulgence.

Good grief.
What nonsense. Again, the fear is so obvious in beliefs such as this.
I'm glad that not all religions push such agendas of fear.

Allow me to give you several truly helpful behaviors that are truly not too hard to help you through the unfair cajolery of certain substances and behaviors:

Yes, secular AA-rejectors, these are helpful to you:

• Be aware of those things that are potentially tempting to you and deliberately create options. Know when you will be in the presence of things/people/behaviors that entice you to distraction and make a plan for getting through the moment.
  This is simply self-preservation.
• Or simpler, avoid those places.
  Remove yourself from places where temptation lives. You are a powerful being with the ability to make choices and you deserve to create healthy places and spaces for yourself.
  This is simply good planning.
• Be as truly honest with yourself and others about those things that are problematic for you. This honesty sets the stages for personal interventions and empowerment in the face of strong urges. Because you can become stronger and stronger in the struggle each time you find your way to a healthier decision.
• Practice making good, healthy choices. In down time, create scenarios and scenes in your mind where you address the temptation and succeed in making other choices that are healthier and more full of integrity.
  This is simply self-empowerment.
• Remind yourself of your goals and of your values and of the positive consequences of making decisions of health, sobriety, integrity, personal power. Imagine the success of those moments where no one is watching you and you do not give in to another kitten or problematic behavior.
  This is simply getting conscious that a decision lies before you and that you have the power to make things happen through your behavior, through your daily choices.
  You have the power.
• Create a meaningful life. Friends, hobbies, activities, work that is meaningful. All of these things, and more, fill in the spaces of boredom, depression, self-pity, even of celebratory moods that might lead one to ignore moment of choice that one is facing.
  This is simply finding supportive places and people.
• Remember that you are on a journey. Life is a journey and you want to create the best life possible. In this moment.

But still, the point, atheists are not atheists because we are embracing temptation. We are atheists because it makes sense.

As for temptation...
No guilt.
No shame.
No sin.
No name calling.
So self-flagellation. 
No demons luring you to your doom.
Just one human being making the most of their life.

And also, regarding how atheists prefer temptation:

😄

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Perspective: You Matter

Perspective.
It's a thing that you can't wish for; you have to find it, sometimes in unexpected places. Have you ever seen that moment in Grand Canyon, a Kevin Kline movie from 1991, when the young troubled teenager sees the Grand Canyon for the first time? 

I didn't love the entire movie (though I might check it out again in case I missed the real meaning of the film), but one thing that struck me to the absolute core while watching it in the 90s was that moment, the Grand Canyon moment, that moment that slapped me with the grandeur of our planet, of our solar system, of our universe. That moment still gives me a major hit of perspective. All of those struggles of my life are, in fact, small things in the grand scheme of it all. And that, somehow, comforts me.

But there's more. Do you ever find yourself in a crowd of people and feel a part of a mob until, suddenly, some individual catches your eye. Then you realize you are a part of a group of humanity. That each of these people has an incredibly complex web of life, at least as complex as our own life. It's kind of a crazy thing, to realize that each person we meet or don't meet is living within a network of complications, relationships, past, present, future, finances, memories, likes and dislikes, conflicts, expectations, inadequacies, successes. And that's cool and also gives me perspective.

But there's more. It's how we are each a part of that complex network. How do we keep ourselves from feeling completely tiny and insignificant while knowing that we are a part of such a huge reality? It's a completely human struggle, to feel important, meaningful, significant while walking in that mob, while sitting at home, while moving through our days. Because, the thing is, it's not just a thing we want, it's a thing we need, to feel necessary, needed, respected. Like we matter. I honestly think I need to feel some sense of this each and every day. 
Do you?

Weirdly, I have an answer to this.

I have given this one quite a bit of thought in my life. It's a human thing, right? And I've figured out the single best way for myself to find ways to feel significant and that is to BE significant to others. This is a thing that I can do and do do every day. I tell people that they matter to me, why they are important, what I love about them. I touch people with my hands. I look at people in the eyes as I talk to them, when I tell them that I appreciate what they have done or who they are. It's that old adage the more you give the more you get, 
I guess.

Give it a try. Start today. Tell the people in your life that they are meaningful to you and why. Find a lovely pause in your day and do it. Make someone's day. Make your own day.

You will feel significant.
Because you are. 

I hope my friend doesn't mind that I used her image.

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There are Hateful People out There

I know.
It's true.
There are truly unpleasant human beings out there in the world. The angry, the racist, the selfish, the intolerant, the lout. They're there and they're generally loud. My Facebook feed can overwhelm me at times when I see the hateful things that people post, that people find humorous, or that some people spout. I think that we see these people only because they are loud and in places easy to see.

But the truth is, there are more wonderfully loving people out there. The people who follow their passions and who enjoy their lives to the fullest. The people who take pictures of the blue, blue sky. People who give their lives to the care of their loved ones. People who always make a point to look you in the eye when they greet you, right in the eye so you know that you are being seen. People who lay out pennies for the luck seekers.

There are  humans who dance to their own tunes. People walk our sidewalks with goodness in their hearts and with coins jingling in their pockets, paying the parking meter of strangers. People who pay it behind at the drive through. People who research and built and create. People who speak up for the pets in need of love and family. People whose very jobs , their very livelihoods are taking care of the neediest among us. There are people who speak the truth with trembling hands and voices, yet they speak it. There are people who look under bridges for those in need.


There are people who greet you with a kiss, people who sing on the bus, people who leave a larger than necessary tip, people who notice your mood, people who look to the stars and learn their names. Our world has people who hide a little for their own protection but who also show tremendous courage when seeking connection. There are people who exhibit extraordinary courage by their very brave actions and revolutionary hearts. 

There are people who are frightened beyond belief but who still stand up and say the truth. There are people who will stop and step over the earthworm on a rain soaked sidewalk. There are people brave enough to forgive someone who is not apologetic. There are people who are brave enough to say I'm sorry. People who have the bravery and integrity to go the extra mile whether anyone else notices or not. People who do the right thing because it is the right thing. People who seek truth and justice. People who pay for the guy behind them in line.

There are people who ignore your errors, who don't correct your pronunciation of words you've only read. Or who DO because they appreciate your efforts. People who stop to notice the beauty of the trees or the clouds. People who sing at the top of their lungs in their cars. People who stand in front of the bully. People who wear purple. People who tat up for the fun of it. People who leave sunshine where there is rain. People who find ways to share their freshness. People who pick up ugliness left by others. People who care. People who smile in spite of it all. 

There are people who, when you ask How are you?  will tell you and people who, when you ask What are you up to?  will tell you about their passions. There are people who bravely present themselves to the world. And people who hide certain parts of themselves until they are certain someone will love them. And some people show love, love in the face of all. More and more love.

Be one of these people.  Be the reason that some people can again believe in the goodness of humanity.

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I Couldn't be a Millionaire or a Billionaire

If there is one thing I don't understand as I read the news these days, it is the upper crust, the top 1% of people who have insane and savage amounts of cash. I simply don't get that. Surely there is some mental illness label for people like this, people who can hold onto obscene amounts of money, who even collect and desire more, at a time when so many humans have such need.

I simply could not be a millionaire or a billionaire, because I couldn't keep that money. I COULDN'T be a millionaire. I already give away far too much money. My poor husband is always having to add large sums to the GIFT$ section of our budget. I cannot help it; I get far better feelings giving it away than I ever did having it. I know this for I have done it again and again...

I cannot fathom how a human being can have reserved cash when other human beings are homeless, in need, unable to pay for necessities, kids with needs, humans living in poverty, entire countries struggling, incredibly worthy opportunities to support research or cool projects, investment in people and ideas, and on and on. I have about two dozen friends who could each use a million dollars or more. I know of about a dozen very worthy groups who do amazing good in their communities who could use another million. I know of entire cities who need essentials such as clean water, electricity, safe and adequate schools, health care, services for veterans, civic projects, humans of all age who could use my billions. 

No, if I was a millionaire or a billionaire today, tomorrow I would not be. 
And I would be happy.

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The Apocalypse

I'm not trying to be particularly provocative or negative with this post, 

it's just something I've been thinking about. 

With the continuous human global unrest, I'm sure that a part of all of us wonders what a nuclear blast would be like. We've had at least 2,624 nuclear explosions worldwide since the technology was developed during WWII, detonated by at least eight nations. 
Did you know that? 2,626. 
Think of it.
Isn't that simply ridiculous?

Our species has found 2,626 reasons to release the explosive, concussive power of the atom. This count doesn't even count unknown blasts, underground blasts, and some other types of bombs. It's almost like we can't help ourselves...

Add the infinite number of years that our universe has been in existence, during which time continual annihilation of matter has occurred. It stands to reason that our little haven of a solar system will experience cataclysm some time.

Add other scenarios besides nuclear Armageddon that humans could intentionally or unintentionally bring upon ourselves including ecological disaster, particle accelerator accident, pandemics of all possible origins, 
or some sort of advanced AI scenario not in our favor 

And that brings me to my point.

I'm actually quite OK with the idea of total annihilation of human beings from this planet. With some very marked and noteworthy exceptions, our species has been quite destructive over all. We have poisoned our own planet, our own backyards. We spew toxicity directly into our life-giving atmosphere. 
We have divided ourselves into ever-increasing divisions. We treat our own teeming masses with derision and disrespect. We depersonalize anyone different from ourselves. We remove human rights with personal bias. We show exceptionally cold contempt for other life forms on our planet. We are extremely myopic. And many of us are so confused by various ideologies that we are unable to think our way through the morass.

Thanks to some biological developments and some serendipitous timing, our species is sentient and capable of knowing all of the above issues that allow us to threaten our own existence. I simply don't get it how we don't take this as seriously as possible. 

I don't want an apocalypse, I simply can see it as a distinct possibility. 
And if it happens, with some very market and noteworthy exceptions, 
it won't be a huge loss on this universe.

But it COULD be a loss.
Our species could be incredibly positive in the cosmic universe if, and only if, we can learn to put aside our differences and to value this planet.

No Longer Quavering

I don’t care what others think of me,
which is pretty damn liberating.
How many people worry that they’ll say or do the wrong thing
and someone—god or a friend--
will judge or dislike them?
Those are shackles we put on ourselves.
If there’s one thing I learned from being atheist,
it’s that it just doesn’t matter what others think.
I don’t need approval – from anyone.
And when I screw up, I can forgive myself.   
Kids Without Religion

I have spent decades Dec!!! Ades!!!! of my life worrying. I used to worry a great deal about what others thought, kept myself buttoned up and tamped down, kept close tabs on my emotion. I used to almost never deliver opinion publicly. Hard to believe, I know. Some of this tremulousness came from my slightly-anxious personality; some of it likely came from family-of-origin dynamics.

But those days are OVER. 
Never again will I tiptoe around those who bugle their voice all over the place. Never again will I tuck my chin down, lower my eyes, and demurely take it. Never again will I doubt that my thoughts and opinions have equal value to every other person in the room. Because I and YOU have value and presence.

I Will not Be Quiet

If you spout your LGBTQ hatred, I will not sit quietly and let you have the stage. If you deliver a diatribe of your racist beliefs, I will not sit still and let your bullshit stand center stage. I simply will not be tolerant of your intolerance any longer.

But why? Because I enjoy the debate, the limelight, 
the battle?
Absolutely not. SOOOO much no.

I detest debates. But I detest hatred and isms. 
It hurts me inside, truly, when people throw bombs at the gay or lesbian or transgender, at the atheist, at the brown or black person, at the person outside of the mainstream, at the person courageous enough to stand up honestly and with integrity, at the person from another country, 
at those living in poverty, at those marginalized in any way. It hurts me. 

My heart is wounded nearly every day from the words I read online, from the voices I hear on social media. Yeah, inside I'm no longer quavering, but I'm wounded, pained. But I promise you this, if I hear one person standing on the head of another person, whether the object of derision is present or not, 
I will not stand down. I will face the spreader of misinformation or the provocateur and I will tell them truths, point-by-point. I will stand up for the person whose voice is quavering.

I have had several times when my defense of the silent was considered rude. ME, the rude one because I had the temerity to confront the anger, hatred, prejudice. In some circles I am considered rude! But count on it, I will no longer tolerate your intolerance.
I will no longer be silent.


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The Virtue of Doubt

The beginning of wisdom

 is found in doubting; 

by doubting we come to the question, 

and by seeking 

we may come upon the truth.

Pierre Abelard

(1079-1142)

I want to give this idea some thought, the idea that doubt is a virtue. Let's unpack it a little. I would venture to say that every single person who ever claimed to have or claims to have a religious outlook on life has had periods of doubt in their life. It is a very human thing. In fact, the church holds faith, over doubt, as one of the highest virtues one can hold. Much of the church's teaching, in fact, tells that having faith even when doubt is sucking one's mind into the unending fire is the highest virtue and is, therefore, essential to being in good graces with the Christian god.

Furthermore, doubt is considered a form of pride in the church. Another sinful thing, pride. It seems that the church wants nothing more than to save all believers from the sin of pride, the sin of doubt, by encouraging them to maintain faith in the face of doubt. What treacley goodness comes when one experiences doubt and yet chooses faith over that doubt.

Whereas I say that doubt is a human being's natural function common sense sticking its head above the water and wondering what in the world am I doing in this crazy place. 

A goodly amount of churchy effort goes in to the practice of encouraging adherents to maintain faith in the face of doubt. As Dieter F. Uchtorf said doubt your doubts before you doubt your faith. I've got to admit, that's cute and catchy. Another cute pat on the head, Little One, is that expression Don't dig up in doubt what you planted in faith. 

In other words, give us some time to beat your common sense back into submission.

I wonder how many bouts of doubt I weathered before finally finding a way out of the church? Quite a few, actually, because I can clearly recall several of them. Moments when my eyes began to open, to see the ridiculous, to see the obviously man made parts of religion before being subsumed back into the fable and the pageantry. Back to the place where Thomas is a cautionary tale rather than a human being looking for clear, true signs of the resurrection...signs that should have been easy to display in that moment...to dear Doubting Thomas. I mean, just show me your wound, Lord, since we're right here and all.

Yes, those moments when doubt begin creeping up, story inconsistencies, weird/rewritten church history, obvious power plays, moments when the church as an institution, a money-making institution vs. a creation of a deity, becomes so clear, moments when the very kernel of truth of a religion becomes undeniably shaken. Having the courage to explore the doubt, to explore the questions more fully, to entertain the idea that the mustard seed is a truly ridiculous metaphor.

The truth is, being able to change one's mind when presented with new information is the true sign of courage and maturity; doubt is a true virtue. So listen to your doubt; it's trying to tell you something. Allow me to end this little diatribe with one of my favorite quotes by Bertrand Russell:

 The whole problem with the world 
is that fools and fanatics are always so certain of themselves, 
and wiser people so full of doubts. 

Bertrand Russell

 

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Why are You so Angry at God???

This post was featured on Karen Garst's blog faithlessfeminist.com

I am delighted to see it so well-received there. The idea for this post started about five years ago when I read a book by atheist activist  Christina called Why are You Atheists So Angry?: 99 Things that Piss Off the Godless. 

I thought Greta's book was brilliant, but incomplete. And that's why I took this effort to add to the incredibly long list of things that I an angry about. Please add your own in the comments.



Am I raging and wounded? Have I seen too much pain and unfairness that 
I have entered a period of anger at God? Am I in despair and feeling hopeless? Am I afraid that God has abandoned me in my desperation? 
Am I feeling that Life Isn’t Fair? Am I unable to locate any gratitude towards God?

In my time I have been accused several times of being angry at God? 
The Christian god, presumably. People making this suggestion to me never ever take my reply as honest. They simply cannot accept the reality that, 
No, I am surely not angry at your god.

The truth is, I have no anger whatsoever at any so-called deity.
I do have anger at religion though, tons of it. 

The organizational, structured shame and guilt and abuse and prejudice and hatred and misogyny.

I’m absolutely livid that the conservative right has placed an abhorrent human being in the White House because that man had the lack of integrity enough to play to their agenda. I’m further enraged, enraged I say, that those people have given up their own abilities to think clearly and have looked to their religion to determine their political allies. It has divided this country in half.

I have anger at the YEARS of sexual abuse cover ups in the church, at the abuse of power and religious political power, at the tens of billions of dollars of financial abuses, overt lies and manipulation, all religious wars, massive sexual abuse scandals that are forgiven by church authorities, encouragement of faith over reason.

All pics Courtesy of Pinterest

I’m angry about every single effort to defeat true knowledge in the place of religion, about inculcating children into the fantasy of religious belief, about religious teachings taught in classrooms and offered as facts to the minds of children, about prayer over medical treatment, about every effort to hide truth under the cloth of bullshit, about the fact for each and every single person who has ever struggled to understand something in earnest while being taught to stick with faith, and about every vile adult male who ever married or injured a young girl or boy well within the bounds of their religious practices or traditions.

I'm angry that black atheists have to struggle doubly hard to be freethinker in this country. 

Black Nonbelievers, Inc.

I’m angry that all doubt in the religious mind is told that it is the resident demon putting those thoughts into their head. UGH.

I’m thoroughly disgusted that outrageously, overtly powerful and wealthy people are thought to be humble. It is abhorrent that wealthy church members are powerful church members, that people in poverty are encouraged to embrace and accept their position of powerlessness.

I’m disgusted for every single penny or other coinage with the words In God We Trust on them, for every misappropriation of false history passed along, for every single person on their knees in prayer with tears streaming down their faces with the belief that that action is their only option, for all of the church history that has been falsified, and for every single young person struggling with the guilt of absolutely normal maturity and sexuality.

I am fully disgusted at the ostentatious wealth of the Catholic church, 
much of it stolen from conquests, while the church de facto encourages and supports poverty.

I’m saddened tremendously by the people who believe in some nether-regioned bad guy that is after them and all of the anguish that accompanies this belief.

I find it a huge loss that few religious people ever seek to understand the incredible beauty and vastness of the universe. Just think of the millions of minds that have been handicapped by religious belief.

I’m angry that people spend so much of their sincere effort to figure out the Will of God, that the church demonizes nearly all sexual practices, that atheists and all people of logic and reason are considered the least trusted people in this country, that people of all ages anguish and fear the concept of hell, and that all ridiculous stories that make no sense in the holy books are treated as absolute fact or real history.

I’m disgusted with the entire vile concept of Biblical Parenting, that believers are encouraged to discount, cherry pick, or misrepresent the words of their holy books yet those same books are treated as sacrosanct, that perfectly well-meaning, truly good people are encouraged to stick with faith over their own decision-making reasoning abilities, and that this country would never elect an openly atheist into positions of power.

I’m ridiculously angry that a woman’s right to personal autonomy has become a favorite witching call of the religious right.
I am angry that, were I to die at this moment, some of my family members would believe that I was burning in hell for all eternity... and this is the religion that they choose!

I'm livid and the more fundamental the religion, the fewer rights women have.

I am angry that the powerful religions on this planet that still exist do so by having exterminated the other religions and acolytes of those religions that existed before them, by torturing people into fearful belief, and by every other violent and forced method of spreading a belief system.

I’m genuinely angry that truly GOOD people honestly have been convinced that it is their religion that prevents them from committing horrific acts of murder, rape, or other rapaciousness.
I’m angry that the best fricking thing we have to offer people attempting to recovery from addictions of all sorts is a treacly religious 12-Step program.

I’m disgusted that religious families are tragically encouraged to abandon family members who have differing beliefs or understandings of the world.

I’m angry that adults all over the planet are satisfied with not knowing things, and that the churches systematically install so many of the feelings inside of a believer that confuse them so very much.

I am livid that CHILDREN are taught to fear, reject, revile, hate people different from themselves. Every form of racism and white supremacy supported by the Christian religion shocks and outrages me.

I’m angry that my children and all children of reason often have felt like they wanted or needed to go into hiding due to the pressures or disdain from the believers around them and that those same children have been told that they are going to hell.

I’m angry that most third world countries are so mired in evangelized missionary doctrine that they are stripped of their own powers and of their own belief systems.

I am truly disgusted with the entire concept of sin and how the church teaches and controls and tortures the emotions of adherents with it.

I’m angry that the majority of people in this country are religious and that any effort to secularize the government or the culture is treated as UNFAIR or as a THREAT to religion.

I’m angry with the smarmy well he believes in you response to atheism.

I am angry with the teaching that we are all inherently evil people and that the only way to salvation is through the church.
I’m angry as heck that so many truly good people anguish over the possibility of losing a freaking afterlife rather than finding ways to make this life a truly good, just, loving, and meaningful one.

I’m angry that autonomy and personal power are not important tenets of the religions of the world.

Am I angry with a god?
Not at all.

It turns out that what I am angry at is the power-hungry narcissist human beings who control the hearts and minds of so many people on this planet using religion as their walking stick.

Are you angry?

 Thank you Karen Garst for your atheist activism

and for your blog Faithless Feminist.

 

You might also enjoy:
For Someone Who Doesn't  Believe in God, You Sure Talk About Him Alot
My Atheist Memes and Late Night Angst
That Hideous Dance Between Faith and Critical Thinking
I'm a Lover not a Fighter