Friday, May 29, 2015

Sometimes You Have to Say "No"

My daughter is so upset that we can't send her to Los Angeles to go to a convention for lovers of Korean pop music. But MOM, it's only $1200!!!

As much as we would love to send her to meet her favorite singer on the planet, it's just unreasonable to spend that much money in that way. Every single parent will have an evening like this one; I promise you will have an evening like this if you are a parent. I remember the one that I put my dad through.

In the end, she was able to get some sleep and to express her understanding that, in reality, the request was kind of preposterous.

UGH. It was a very unfun and exhausting night here in the house. 

Aaand we have two guests staying overnight.
But it could have been worse.

Anyway, tonight, as I think about this daughter of mine, I am awash in love for her. She is fierce and sensitive. She is perceptive. She is unique as hell. She is breathtaking. She is electrifying. She is eloquent. She is strong and delicate. She is so exceptional. She is a freaking work of art! She has made me into the parent that I am today. 

In fact, she has made me into this person. Because of her I understand that beneath strength one might discover patches of exquisite delicacy. I have learned that the roaring storm of an exchange can be harmonized, moderated, beatified with an expression of pure love. An explosion and flash are covers for sensitive, discouraged, or contemplative. So much of these discoveries were news to me at one time.

Me learning to be gentle and observant and respectful of her needs has taken many of her childhood years, and she is aware of this. She knows that I try very hard to understand and respect her need to express herself in honesty and integrity.

My husband and I tried to help her through this discouraging night...I'm not sure we helped much. Sometimes you have to say No, even when you would love to say Yes. At the end of it all, I am sitting here feeling so proud of this young woman who calls me Mama.

If you enjoyed this post you might also like:

Challenging Teen, Redux
Proud Momma Moment:  My Daughter's Rant 
A Parental Confession

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