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My 16 year old daughter has been struggling with depression for a few years now. It's impossible for me to pinpoint exactly when a thing we call depression started because she is a glass is half-empty kind of person. How can I know when everything switched from stuff is just always annoying, disappointing, boring, insufferable to I am miserable and my life has become unmanageable? The depression came on fairly slowly. But there is always that moment when we told her that we were moving her to the other side of the world, away from every known thing, away from every beloved thing. That might have been a turning point. (Ya think?) And those early months here in Brisbane were very tough on her.
The point is that at some point her propensity to view things from the negative side had made her life feel like a prison to her. She no longer felt able to enjoy life. She felt a victim to her own mood most of the time.
In addition to having a totally cool therapist for a mother, Elizabeth started taking antidepressants. They helped immediately. Not 100%. Not every day. But she did feel a lightening of the overwhelming blackness in her mind. She saw a therapist down here two times. She felt that seeing the therapist was a good move.
Additionally, she was doing some writing and some reading, working things through with me, and doing what she called music therapy. Elizabeth seems to have earbuds cemented to her ears. Using iTunes she created a playlist of songs that lifted her up, moved her, meant something to her, or that spoke truly to her. She has made this playlist into CDs for a couple of friends who are also struggling with their moods, their relationships, their connections and who have also felt some comfort or lifting up while listening to these songs.
Not all of the songs are familiar to me and may not be familiar to you. But your teen knows most of them. Some songs on this list are Australian and may not be known in the States or in other parts of the world. I have made each song into a link from Youtube. You can also find most of them on iTunes, download them, and give them a listen. Maybe surprise your teen with two CDs of music selected just for them!
However you choose to use this list, Elizabeth is very proud to pass it along to you as another tool in the fight against depression in our beloved teenagers.
However you choose to use this list, Elizabeth is very proud to pass it along to you as another tool in the fight against depression in our beloved teenagers.
Just The Way You Are - Bruno Mars
Today my Life Begins - Bruno Mars
Tonight I'm Getting Over You - Carly Rae Jepson
Little Things - One Direction
What Makes You Beautiful - One Direction
Hero - Mariah Carey
Let It Go - Idina Menzel
The Horses - I only know the Taylor Henderson version
Affirmation - Savage Garden
Alive - Dami Im
Declaration - David Cook
Heroes - David Cook
Time of My Life - David Cook
Lift Your Spirit - Harrison Craig
You Raise Me Up - Harrison Craig or Josh Groban
Gold - Owl City
Shooting Star - Owl City
Beautiful Soul - Jesse McCartney
She's No You - Jesse McCartney
Because You Live - Jesse McCartney
I'll Be Your Strength - The Wanted
Gold Forever - The Wanted
Rocket - The Wanted
Roar - Katy Perry
Wings - Little Mix
I'd Come For You - Nickelback
Never Gonna Be Alone - Nickelback
Lullaby - Nickelback
Beautiful - Christina Aguilera
Happy - Pharell Williams
Drops Of Jupiter - Train
Unwritten - Natasha Bedingfield
It's a Beautiful Day - Michael Buble
Hall of Fame - The Script (feat. will.i.am)
Diana - One Direction
Through The Dark - One Direction
Most importantly, if your child listens to it, you listen to it too. Become familiar with the songs that your child is living inside of. Listen to the music together. Elizabeth and I have songs on this list that are specific to our relationship; I'm thrilled to see them on the list. These teen years are SO intense and lonely for so many kids. I remember how important my music was to me and it's the same for our kids. Enter their world.
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| I'm Elizabeth and I approve of this post. |
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Just
a quick reminder to visitors and readers, you can also find my
writing on:
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May I also suggest this post: My Daughter is Fierce!
May I also suggest this post: My Daughter is Fierce!
You
might also enjoy: Cuddling Cures the Meloncholy
Or
this one: A Letter to the Parents of a "Difficult" Child
I don't know most of the songs, but I agree, music has a special power. I hope Elizabeth finds her way out of that hole. The fact that she has acknowledged it, that she has talked about it, sought help and also tried to find ways on her own to lift her up shows how mature she is. All the best to her and you all as a family!
ReplyDeleteYep, music can really help heaps.That's a good list there :)
ReplyDelete