Friday, December 27, 2013

Just a Regular Day

secular parenting humanist homeschool blog raising atheist skeptical freethinking humanist parenting

I'm sitting on the ugliest couch in the world, right between the hard wooden slats, and I'm sitting in between all of the junk on the couch that I pushed over to give my bottom a place to sit. The trash can is overflowing about two feet to my right and the dusty fans are blowing in all directions on my left. The weirdest Christmas tree across from me. The kids are in their rooms listening to iPods and watching videos on laptops. My husband is now wagging his bottom at me through the door on his way to an early bedtime. Lol

Earlier this evening I went into my room to read a book because everyone was interested in their own thing. Before long John came into my room and we started chatting. He called Elizabeth into the room and before long we were playing Twenty Questions, playing The Tickle Game, and just Laughing Out Loud in general with stories, impressions, and silliness. It has to have been one of the funniest evenings we've had in a long time! We ended up hanging out there for almost six hours, laughing and laughing!

We are such an imperfect family. The laundry can sit for DAYS. There is an argument over whose night it is to do dishes almost every single evening. Elizabeth eats frozen pizza, salty ramen soup, and carrots every. single. day. (She takes a variety of vitamins and such...) John eats chocolaty breakfast cereal. Each step to the upstairs has its own little dust bunnies in each corner. Our Christmas tree is a white branch in a pot. I seriously don't like your kittens or your puppy pictures. We have a huge lizard living under our patio. The kids both have that zombie-eyed look when they are online. Elizabeth plays Candy Crush and listens to music 24/7. We've only been in this country for 15 months and we have a half of a basket of single socks. An entire end of my kitchen table hasn't been cleaned off in months. Sometimes I leave the house alone just to listen to music. I mainly gave gift cards to the kids for Christmas. I miss fast food from back home as much as I miss people. I will take the last of the ice cream. John needs to shower and to have his nails trimmed. Sometimes I let everyone fend for themselves for dinner. Elizabeth's bedroom door only opens half way.

Yet I still think, WOW, what an amazingly wonderful family I have!

My children impress me on a daily basis! And the great news is how much emotional growth I have seen in Elizabeth in the past few months. She is truly moving into a new phase of more mature thinking. The other day, after a particularly difficult loss, Elizabeth sat close to me and said, Mom, I could be very depressed right now, but I have chosen to feel happy today. I'm telling you, she is like a huge blossoming gorgeous flower these days!!!

John was walking with me the other day telling me all about his extensive plans for when we get home...he's amazing! And Jer and I have been doing the same thing, making plans and looking for new ways to improve our lives together. (We are considering going vegetarian again...)

My point is that no one is perfect. We are all just kind of...normal. All of us.

Please, never compare yourself or your children to any other person. They are them and you are you. No matter what age you are or your children are and no matter what phase of life you are in, you are OK just as you are.

John said to me You are the perfect mom for me, Mom. And YOU are the perfect parent for your children. You know them better than anyone else in the world... So relax, it will be OK.

Oh, and I made spaghetti and jarred sauce for dinner.

With special THANKS to Finding Joy blog!

If you enjoyed this post you might also read: 

Thankful 365 Days a Year
A Perfectly Average Day
Why I Worry

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  1. Perfectly imperfect :-) Thank you for sharing, so I don't feel like a constant slob. Spending time with the kids is sure the most important thing. We have enough time to clean once they've left home :-)

    1. Yes!!!!!!!!
      ..........reminding myself of that now.


  2. One of my friends (a single mum) raised her children 'differently' to what was expected. From a very young age, she kinda scaffolded them while they learnt something new like using public transport. Then she'd start taking pieces of the scaffolding away so that now at age 10, 11 and 15 they are the most independent kids I have ever seen. People have always given her grief about things, like "oh my godddd how can you let your kids do that on their own?" but it's just the way they roll and works perfectly for them!

    1. That is a PERFECT example of excellent parenting!!!!!!!!

  3. I seriously needed this today. I have a newborn (my third) and recently spent my first day home alone with all three kids (all under 5). I've been planning to homeschool, but half way through the day found myself texting a friend saying how much I was seriously considering going back to work full time and would never be able to homeschool. I still don't know if I can manage, but this gives me hope--like so many of your posts do. Thank you for writing. Thank you so much.


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