Tuesday, April 5, 2016

Signs I'm Getting Older

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I hate to acknowledge it but time is really catching up with me. It's more than just how much I love the music at the grocery store. Over the weekend my husband Jerry and I went to two different concerts.

One was the Kingston Trio. While at this concert we were definitely the youngest people in the crowd...by several decades. It was a wonderful show and I adored it. The other show we saw was Styx. At this concert Jerry and I were definitely right there in the middle of the ages.

The music was great but WOW was I feeling old while I was at the Styx show. The music was quite loud. I wanted to watch the show while sitting down rather than standing like most of the crowd. The crowd contained many bald heads and alot of grey hair. And think about this: Jerry and I were delighted to see his ex-wife and her husband. Who does that? It's a sign of utter maturity.

But there are more things that are kind of bugging me about aging:
  • I am totally losing my eyebrows. Why do they have to go? 
  • But I do have hair growing out of my nose. 
  • My knees actually hurt when I'm just sitting. 
  • My kids buy their own clothes. 
  • I have zero interest in loud music; I turn the music down when I really want to hear it. 
  • When I want to celebrate, I make a nice cup of tea. 
  • Just...chins. 
  • When I need help with the computer I go to my son. 
  • I have a collection of purses that I haven't carried in years.
  • I now understand eye lifts and botox.
  • I prefer my old. comfy shoes. 
  • I don't crave infants. 
  • I look in the mirror and, every day, I'm shocked with that woman reflected back.
  • Anime' is a total mystery to me. 
  • My husband has a grey chest hair. 
  • I keep an umbrella handy.
  • Nearly every visitor who comes to this house refers to me as Mom
  • I've been out of the job field for so long that most of my past employers no longer exist. 
  • I prefer the lights down low. 
  • But I can't read without large fonts or bright lights...or longer arms. 
  • Shopping is completely not enjoyable because I have enough stuff. 
  • I actually care about politics. 
  • Slang sounds ridiculous coming out of my mouth. 
  • When my kids are talking smack to each other I barely understand their insults. 
  • The other day I wore navy blue socks with my sandals and I thought that looked OK. 
  • Noisy bars annoy and overwhelm me. 
  • I like the TV off. 
  • I can't remember shit. 
  • I watch birds out of the window. 
  • I think of unfamiliar songs as noise.
  • I compare everything with back in the day
  • Alcohol only makes me tired. 
  • I keep antacid within reach. 
  • My make up is older than my car. 
  • I'm proud of a good check up at the dentist.
  • My sleep pattern is so weird. 
  • I can't name a single current day pop singer or band.
  • I don't understand the card games kids are playing these days.
  • Disheveled bed head makes me look like the Wicked Witch of the East instead of tousled and sexy. 
  • I thought the bagger at the grocery story was entertained by my humor and thought I was cool but I realized he was tolerating my aged attempts at socializing, treating me with deference. 
  • My kids can finish my stories for me because I've told the stories so many times. 
  • My favorite movies and songs are forty years old.
  • So many of the superstars of my time are dead or dying.
  • I think our local police force looks too young to be cops.
  • The music in the relaxing restaurant is too loud.
  • I don't care who cuts my hair.
  • I sometimes leave the house without checking the mirror and, later, I'm shocked with what I am wearing in public.
  • I had another one but I forgot it.

Yes, it's happening, and faster than I like to admit. But I refuse to end this blog post with that standard comment about getting older is better than the alternative. I refuse to do that!
Even though it's true.

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