When our family returned home from Brisbane about six months ago I knew it would take us some time to adjust to being back home when we felt like our home was over there. I can admit it: we have trouble with change!Elizabeth and John had such different ways of handling the drastic switch and if you have read this blog for any length of time you know that a great deal of thought went into adjusting.
If your family is planning on a major move, I highly recommend planning for the adjustment period. Give it time. Recognized the need for acclimating. It takes longer than you might expect.
In the meantime, now that we were home, Elizabeth was struggling to adjust.
Those many months ago I printed out about a hundred mandalas, bought her some fun pens and markers, handed her her iPod, PC, and pillow, and let her at it. For about a month she could be found laying, sitting, leaning, coloring.Some people didn't understand me allowing, encouraging her to take this time, and that is OK.
But this adjustment period allowed her to be in her head and in the world at the same time. It allowed her time to have friends contact her, family to visit, space in the house to adapt, and her heart to heal.
Six months later and those mandalas are still on our mirror wall in the front room, greeting visitors as they enter. Almost everyone exclaims at their beauty and creativity.
Helps Elizabeth to feel ....... at home.
heh, I was nodding along with what you were saying because it reminds me of conversations I've had with people who have withdrawn their children from school due to anxiety/bullying/etc. I've told people to not stress about having to 'do stuff' right away and that if their child needs to just lay there on the couch staring out the window lost in their thoughts, or if they just want to sit there doodling, let them, especially if they seem to be benefiting from it. Sometimes I notice my daughter has been quiet for ages so I check on her and she's lying on the floor just staring at the ceiling and I've had to fight the urge to say hey, whatcha thinking about? And just let her 'come back' in her own time. Also, WOW I can't believe you have been back home that long already! Still annoyed I discovered your blog very soon after you visited Melbourne :)
ReplyDeleteI honestly think of you often and how disappointed I am that you and I didn't get together while we could!!!!!!
DeleteThese mandalas must have really helped your daughter. There is a reason mandalas are used in meditation. It is difficult for children to move from one country to another. It is difficult for adults too, and often just staring in space or doodling helps. I find that blogging is great as well.
ReplyDeleteVagabonde, your blog is WONDERFUL!
DeleteThank you for commenting here so that I could follow the links to your writing!